


The Birds, the Bees, and the Spideys

by Arisu44



Category: The Avengers (2012)
Genre: M/M, Superfamily, Superhusbands
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-11-01
Updated: 2012-11-01
Packaged: 2017-11-17 13:26:48
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 515
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/552045
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Arisu44/pseuds/Arisu44
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tony and Steve give Peter the dreaded sex talk, much to Peter's dismay.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Birds, the Bees, and the Spideys

Steve sat across from Peter in a computer chair, preparing himself for what was about to transpire. He had gone over this moment a billion times in his head but nothing compared to the real thing. Peter was shifting uncomfortably, his gaze shifting between his dads nervously. Tony leaned against the door frame, seeming cool and calm.

"Peter, your dad and I need to talk to you about something very important," Steve started, looking at Tony for encouragement. Tony gave him a reassuring nod. "You're getting to the age where you might start to get interested in boys. Or girls! We're okay with whatever you want. It's completely up to you. We respect any decision you make," he started to ramble, wringing his hands in his lap.

Tony stepped in then, seeing that Steve was obviously crashing and burning. The great Captain America couldn't even manage to have a simple talk with his son. "What your father is trying to say is that we want you to be safe," Tony picked up where Steve left off, moving across the room to sit next to Peter on the bed. "At your age you're going to start getting urges to have sex."

"Tony! Don't say it so crudely," Steve reprimanded the other man, a light blush dusting his cheeks. "Peter, you're going to start having these urges and you need to be safe about it. There are all kinds of diseases going around this day and age and you need to be careful."

"Alright old man. You're awful at this," Tony addressed Steve before turning back to their son who was blushing furiously now, his eyes firmly fixed on his lap.

"Guys... I don't need the talk," he muttered.

"Peter I know this is embarrassing but it's necessary. We're only doing it because we care," Steve comforted, giving the teen a small smile.

"Peter, the next time you get horny I want you to be prepared," Tony said, pulling his wallet out of his pocket. "Take this," he continued, outstretched hand holding a condom. "I want you to use this. It's better to be safe than sorry."

"Tony! Why do you have that in your wallet?" Steve asked blushing again. "Peter give that to me right now! You don't need that!" Steve yelled, reaching desperately for the condom that Peter seemed more than willing to give up but Steve's hands were quickly slapped away by Tony.

"Let him have it Steve. I'm not ready for grand kids yet," Tony said pointedly. "The point is Peter, we want you to be safe." With this Tony stood up from his spot on the bed. "We both love you and we hope that you'll make good choices. C'mon Steve," he said, grabbing his husband's hand and practically dragging him from the room.

"This was so unnecessary!" Peter called, finally getting his voice back.

"And if you need more condoms or a porn mag or something you know who to go to," Tony added, popping his head back into the room, Steve's annoyed call of "Tony!" drifting in from the hallway.

**Author's Note:**

> This is painfully short and poorly written but it was one of my first Avengers fics ever so I'm going to give myself some credit.


End file.
